Parent Brain

If you've left the crayons to melt in the car,
And forgotten just where the car keys are,
There's a perfectly good way to explain:
You see, you've come down with "Parent Brain."

When you're not sure where the past 8 hours went,
Or whether the phone bill check's been sent,
If you've left the laundry drying in the rain,
It's just---you guessed it---Parent Brain.

If you find yourself chatting for hours on end
About diaper prices with your cyberfriends,
You've just caught a particularly virulent strain
Of that affliction known as Parent Brain.

If you left your bags at the grocery store
Or completely forgot what you went there for,
If you called the dog by your baby's name,
You can bet that Parent Brain's to blame.

And if you know the words to "Goodnight Moon" by heart,
Or you study your sleeping babe like a work of art,
If you're always suprised by how time is flying,
And the thought of that first birthday starts you crying.....

It's unavoidable, people, and I feel your pain,
For I, too, suffer from Parent Brain.
But I'll admit one thing---of this I'm sure:
I hope they never find a cure.